Why do people look forward to companionship? What is the purpose of trying to find someone with whom you would want to spend precious moments of your life? What is the purpose of romantic love between two people? This is a universal conundrum which afflicts most of us, and here is my take on it.
What draws two people to each other romantically?Maybe it’s the physical attraction. Maybe it’s the ultimate slaking of a thirst for a form of attention only accomplished when you are the apple of someone’s eyes. Maybe it’s simply the chance of having a companion with whom one can grow old with. All romanticized notions in some form, true in parts pointing towards a whole.
However I believe that at a fundamental level, our species have a very strong desire to share ourselves. Be it our bodies, our vision, our emotions, thoughts etc. You name it and we want to share it with others. However what we desire even more than sharing is the acceptance, nay a positive affirmation from the opposite party without any judgement of things we wish to share with them.
We are in turn drawn to those who react favorably in a manner that pleases our sensibilities. Especially when other conditions such as physical aspects of the person, etc are thrown into the mix, the formula is complete for a strong sense of attraction.
Unfortunately while one sided attraction is a mathematical expression, what we humans desire is a mathematical equation. That is, the opposite person should also want to share themselves with us in a manner similar to what we desire.
Here unfortunately, events, people and emotions are out of our control. The concept of unrequited love, is a classic case of a mathematical expression. There is no equating emotion of similar intensity on the other side balancing this desire.
How often we have reminisced of things that could have been but never were/are. The disappointment due to the lack of reciprocation from the opposite side, often assists in cutting short budding lives, burdened by a societal and peer pressure of constant Facebook and Instagram updates. A by-product of in- your-face lovey-dovey selfies and portraits of perfect relationships through rose tinted glasses (my bad the right word would be ‘filters’) of online stories.
The fact remains that no one ever shares on these platforms those moments of feeling broken and unwanted when they were rejected, a zillion times before finally finding that balancing force of the aforementioned hallowed equation.
I guess the only option is to look forward. That is, constantly tape that pierced heart, fill it up again with patience and hope that the next person will not again dash it to pieces or worse ignore you as if you never existed. The alternative scarily, is only a long and a painful road to through a quagmire of hurt and suffering.
Unfortunately when has knowing something to be true and accepting it as being true ever been the same.